My parents divorced when I was very young and my dad almost immediately remarried. The woman he married had children from a previous marriage, and her daughter was only 1 when we all moved in together. Now, 12 years later, they've divorced. My stepsister and I have always been very close and I never made the distinction between stepsister and blood sister. I still think of her as my real sister. Once they divorced I found out that her brother and her father molested her when she was younger. To make it worse, she had tried telling her mother and her mother told her "it must have been a dream" and took her shopping to "cheer her up". I called child services in January, because I thought her brother's problem needed to be addressed so that he can receive help and to protect her from future occurrences. Now my sister won't speak to me. My phone number is blocked so that I can't call her, she blocked me on Facebook, and all letters go unanswered. I just want to talk to her and explain why I did what I did, so sometimes I think about just showing up at her house. My parents think that's a bad idea since I'm 18 and could get a harassment charge, but that's not what I care about. I know she has to be going through a lot and probably doesn't want to see me. Should I leave her alone and wait for her to come to me? What if I've lost my sister forever? The worst part is no one seems to understand why I'm so upset about this. They scoff at my comparing her to my real sister and my dad insists it's better since she's going to turn out just like her mother (it was a very nasty divorce, she was cheating on my father). No one will talk to me about it without acting like I'm being over-dramatic. My boyfriend tells me to just wait a few years and hope she realizes I was just trying to help her, but I can't just sit and do nothing. Should I leave her alone or continue my efforts?
marinemj:
this is a very tough one, but i think you're boyfriend is right. you did the right thing involving child services. but doing the right thing isn't always easy, and the reason for that is that sometimes, it comes with consequences that aren't fair. your sister is going through a lot right now and she has decided to direct her anger at you. there is nothing you can do to talk her out of it. send her an email, let her know you love her and are there for her when she is ready, and then back off. it may take years, but she will more than likely grow up and realize that you were only looking out for her.
i'm sorry you have to go through this.