help, i want this to work(I just added more info.) |
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As you can tell, i have written about some girls before. Now, nothing ever continued with those girls cause I realized that they really were not for me. Now though, i have a problem. I met this girl a couple of weeks ago and she's awesome. She is beautiful, nice, and actually wants to do something with her life. So, judging on my past experiences, which i haven't had a relationship in 3 years, i decided to not jump in right away. After a few more times of being with her i realized that I really like her and i think it could work out. Now comes the real hard part. I have never been able to get to actually be in a relationship, i can last about the first couple of weeks, then i freeze up and can't make it to the relationship. I don't want this to happen this time, so what do i do. What do i talk about when i talk to her, how often should i be talking to her, all that type of stuff. I can greatly use advice because i don't want her to slip away. How do I do it. Last, we live 1 hour apart, so i can only visit about once a week, but break is coming up so I'll be home for a while. Thank you for the help, i really need it. Update from weekend: This last weekend I went home to see her. We had plans on Friday night to go see a movie after a sports game. When I drove back and continuing through the night my phone did not receive calls or texts. Her phone has been about the same, so I tried my friends phone. We never got around to seeing each other but were able to talk by texts. I was extremely mad because I thought she was blowing me off. The next day I was able to get ahold of her and meet up. She said she wasn't trying to blow me off and was still very interested in me. I want to believe it all but I don't think i can because I grew up with a sister and from watching her with guys I tend to think girls are blowing me off. Any new comments would be helpful or I can also answer questions to further your understanding so you can help me. Thank you. |
Answers
marinemj:staci hit the nail on the head. there is not science to being with someone. just do what you feel- call her, see her, talk to her, whatever. as often as you want. relax.
2007-12-05 13:58
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wullaby:Your "down to the nitty gritty worries" are legitimate. The lack of knowledge and knowing can and does cause a lot of anxiety. The thing, however, is that it all comes to you at its own time - for you. Keep your eyes open and your logic working. One day, your sensitivity will make you a winner. I feel that anything I say will just be smoothing over things; generalizations. Until you get experience, I doubt you will really be able to relate. I do not want to be just another adult downplaying your sensitivity. It is not that I am too busy to tell you, but "unfortunately" or "fortunately" it is fair that you also put in your time to become more seasoned at the time it is right for you. I like your piecing together of things. At least I do not have to tell you to engage your sensitivity. Life is for the longterm. Just trust it will get you where you need to be and with who you need to be. Good luck.
2007-12-11 09:38
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jouli:Seriously why would you waste your time writing that much over such a insubstantial topic.642-873 Who cares what size you are and how much you weigh... and who really cares what another person has to say about it.83-640 If you are that insecure and need constant reassurance that you are skinny, you need to seek professional help.
2010-08-24 23:33
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jouli:generally, when someone accuses people of being to sensitive, it is because he or she is an asshole. there is really nothing you can do about this lady. it's probably just her personality (i have to say though, if you were my friend352-001, i would tease you mercilessly but with affection about your use of the word "butt" when you mean "but.") and there is nothing you can do about her personality. ignore her, and try to limit your contact with her.642-456 if it really gets unbearable, you can talk to her again, since that evidently worked before, at least for a while.
2010-08-29 23:18
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jouli:I may be accused of many things, but not of placing high value on humanity. How about a high value on science and reason? 642-975 They’re often good places to start. Neither religion nor belief in a “higher power” keep one from getting too arrogant; a good education, 650-575 however, best web hosting can. TK0-201 When you learn enough and learn how to reason well, it can help reinforce just how little we really do know. 1D0-541 That can prevent one from being so pompous as to assume they know it all.
2010-09-06 23:53
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staci:
Well, to be honest the best policy for dating is truly being yourself. Call her when you feel like it, talk about whatever makes you happy. And if she likes you back, it will just work out with ease. It's better that she gets to know the real you, anyways, and vice-versa. If you find yourself "freezing up" you need to take a step back from the situation and try to speculate why. It seems that you are either afraid of commitment, or you just haven't met the right person. Either way you will be aware of that, and learn from it. And coming home for "break" will give you the chance to see her often and then decide if it is something that you will pursue. Take it slow, and just relax.