Do you think I should trust my gut instinct about this lady? |
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I HAVE NOT WRITTEN ABOUT THIS BEFORE. THIS WAS THE FIRST TIME THAT I HAVE ASKED ABOUT THIS PROBLEM ON THIS WEBSITE. SO, TO THE LADY WHO SAID I NEED COUNSELING AND I HAVE FRAGILE SELF ESTEEM, YOU ARE DEAD WRONG. I DON'T THINK YOU COULD STAND IT FOR ONE MINUTE IF YOU HAD TO BE IN CLOSE PROXIMITY TO THIS WOMAN. I am a lady who works in close proximity to another lady. I have worked there for a couple of years. I always get the gut feeling that she thinks she is more attractive than me and more appealing to men. I am a very quiet person who is there to do my job and I am very distracted by her loud, constant talking to others in person and on the phone, mostly about herself. It's always about herself, what she will wear, her boyfriends, ex husbands, vacations, weekends, etc. I am there to do a job, but I can't help but feel bad that there is someone very physically close to me all day who thinks that I am nothing compared to her. Do you think that I am right about her? Should I trust my gut feelings? Now you may say, who cares, but it bothers me. Do you think I am right about her? |
Answers
harleygirl:cookie is right. Don't make this woman's issues your issues. If she's the kind of person who thinks you're nothing because she feels she's superior in looks, then she's morally corrupt. You should feel pity for her soul. Be happy in who you are, and don't let how others view you control your life.
2010-08-29 16:47
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marinemj:eleanor roosevelt said "no one can make you feel inferior without your consent." so maybe this woman does think she's more attractive than you are. she probably does. but, seriously, so what? you say it bothers you, but YOU control what YOU allow to bother you. you have written on here asking about this woman before. i am going to make a suggestion and i hope you won't just blow it off: get some professional help from a therapist. you are WAY too wrapped up and concerned with what this woman thinks and does. i get that she's annoying. but i don't care if she's the freaking antichrist- you need some help exploring why you have such fragile self esteem that you are so concerned with the opinion of someone you don't even like, and why you are this terribly distracted by someone so ridiculous.
2010-08-29 18:27
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marinemj:even if you are not the same person who has written in exactly the same tone about exactly the same problem, my answer still stands. you can't do anything about what other people think, so whether she does or does not think that she is better than you doesn't matter unless you let it matter.
2010-08-30 12:39
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whatdoyoumeancookie:
maybe she does think that. you're right, i'm totally going to say "who cares?" You say you're there to do a job; unless your job is dictated by who is most attractive (like if you're a model or possibly a sex worker or something maybe?), then you shouldn't be worrying about it because it's not relevant to your job. You can't compare yourself to other people, and if they are comparing themselves to you then they have self-esteem problems. Which, yeah, who cares!
I don't understand why women feel the need to judge their attractiveness based on the attractiveness of other women. I mean, I do understand why, but let's try to fight that. It's irrelevant to your job. Is your job performance or outcome predicted by how attractive men think you are? No? Then you're taking up valuable brain energy worrying about this, and it's negatively affecting your job performance in return. Cmon!
Also how appealing you are to men isn't a measure of how attractive you are. How come they get to be the judges of that? Fuck that noise.