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My friend may be separating from her husband. She says she needs her friends there for her . Now being there for her to her means going to the bars with her all weekend . I have out grown my bar phase I hate hanging in the bars. I just don't want to spend my entire weekend at the bars there are more things to life than that. she told me this weekend i need to go get some bar attire (clothes) because she is going to be needing me . My way of being there for her is giving advice talk to her for hours on the phone taking her to lunch but that doesn't seem to be her thinking of being there for her .She believes that i should go to the bars all weekend every weekend .I don't mind once in a blue actually i do mind once in blue but i do once in a blue for her .Am I being selfish ?I am surprised she has not out grown this phase and feel old at the places she wants to hang . |
Answers
sweetone:You should ask her what her hobbies or passions are. Then you should plan to go somewhere with those hobbies or passions. There are men everywhere, not just at bars. Just because men are at a bar, it does not mean they are single. I know of a lot of married men who go to bars with their work buddies.
2010-03-07 14:23
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marinemj:you're not being selfish. just tell her you understand she is going through a rough time and you are happy to talk to her or hang out, but it's totally unreasonable to expect you to do something you are not into all the time.
2010-03-07 18:02
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harleygirl:
Don't be bullied into going to the bars. Because she's going through a rough time with her husband, she probably wants to feel attractive and wanted, so this means gaining the attention of other men. It's immature and selfish on her part. Tell her you'll be supportive of her, but that you don't care to hang out in bars and she'll have to find someone else to do that with her. If she doesn't like it, too bad.